Friday, March 15, 2013


When Josh & I were engaged, we began to see, through the couple who led us through premarital counseling, the need for adoption & the blessing it is for families who adopt. We knew before we were married that there was a calling on our lives to adopt, & in the 6 years since then, our passion for adoption has grown. I don't just desire adoption for our family, but I desire to see every orphan have a mommy & a daddy, which is something I constantly pray for.

Last night my friend Sara & I went to a one-night showing of a documentary called Stuck. (Sara & her husband will leave in a few short weeks to pick up their daughter in China.) It is about international adoption & the roadblocks that delay & sometimes prevent children from coming home to their families. It was produced by the Both Ends Burning movement, which hopes to gain a social following that will lead to political change. (Visit the website for more information & to sign the petition that will go to Capitol Hill in May.)

The documentary was very well done & drove me to tears several times; I had to hold back from being *that* sobbing woman who prevents everyone else from hearing the movie. Some of the scenes were too much - seeing babies & children practically stacked on top of each other in institutions, physically malnourished, & in the worst cases, severely mentally damaged due to lack of attention, affection, & mental stimulation. At one point I had to look away because I was so close to breaking into sobs. Conservative estimates say there are 10 million orphans worldwide. I can't even begin to comprehend that number. I so badly want to rock those babies who cry, to hold those children who have never been hugged. I feel so helpless. I know we'll adopt one day. But what is one, two, three kids in the midst of 10 million?

God reminds me that my job is to simply obey, & do what He has set out for us to do. I can't feel responsible for taking care of each orphan. But the burden is there, so I pray. A lot. The world is a broken & hurting place, & I have never been so aware of that fact as I have recently. So many times I am driven to prayer, but I don't know what to pray. But in my cries, I hear the reassuring voice of Jesus. He sees them. He knows. & with that, I must trust. He is a good God. I must believe the promises I see in scripture, & trust in the character of God, that He has this issue in His mighty hands. He sees every last orphan, & He loves them so.

I am so thankful for a God who:
- executes justice for the fatherless (Deut. 10:18)
- is the Father of the fatherless & sets the solitary in a home (Ps. 68:5-6)
- upholds the fatherless (Ps. 146:9)
- sets the Church out to take care of the orphan (James 1:27) & to defend their cause (Isaiah 1:17)
- is their Helper, who takes their cause into His hands (Ps. 10:14)
- is where the orphan finds mercy (Hosea 14:3)

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Life Lately

God is still using the Breaking Free Beth Moore Bible study to kick my tail. The first couple of weeks provided enough for me to pray through for a long time, but alas, the study is 10 weeks long. I'm trying to remain in a place of letting God transform me.

Jack is sleeping a lot better for naps, but just as bad as a newborn at night. I think he's legitimately hungry, so I can't do much about that. I'm praying for strength, energy, patience, etc. every day & praying that God will help him sleep better eventually. This season is rough but I know it won't last. (At least, I'm pretty sure it won't.)

We bought plane tickets to Italy! We were provided with the opportunity to meet our friends Zac & Cara in Tuscany for a week & we couldn't pass it up. We've been to Florence & it is my favorite place in the world so far, so I can't wait to go back. We'll get to see more of the countryside this time & get to experience more true Italian life, off the beaten tourist path. It will be so great to get away with my love & best friend, too! 

I've started trying to be more intentional with my time with Elliot. As a result, the TV is off almost all day & we have had some good lessons going over letters, practicing drawing lines & circles, etc. He is at an age where he picks up things so quickly; it's so funny to hear him say things & see what he does that he saw us do. He loves to play with his cars & trains, have play dates with his friends, & go to the park, the children's museum, or the zoo. He loves his brother & goes back & forth between wanting to play with him, & taking away his toys or getting upset if Jack touches him. 

Jack is all of a sudden no longer a little baby. His personality is developing & he has so much more energy. He has decided he wants to be a big boy too, so he loves sitting up (if he's laying down or reclining, he tries to sit up straight), & if you put him on his stomach, he'll lift up & fling his arms & legs around like he's trying to crawl but just can't figure it out. He loves to watch Elliot & thinks he's hilarious. He's still super snuggly & now likes to burrow his face into my shoulder, particularly when he's tired. He is super smiley & rarely cries, except when he's hungry or really tired. It's so fun to see him develop! I thought it wouldn't be as fun the second time because I've experienced it before, but nope, it's just as great.